I am The Scared Witch, and this is my story. ✨

I have always been drawn to the unseen – and I have always been afraid of it.

As a child, I didn’t know words like spirituality or mysticism. What I knew was prayer. On late nights, when my father was late returning from work, I would whisper prayers into the dark while watching out the window, asking God to bring him safely back. And almost every time, soon after, he would come home.

That was my first knowing: that Someone was listening.

I grew up loving fantasy and magic – stories where the world was layered, where symbols mattered, where invisible forces shaped visible lives. Books, myths, enchanted objects, hidden meanings. I was endlessly fascinated by witchcraft lore, by magical systems, by worlds like the ones I found in books and movies.

And yet, alongside this fascination, there was always caution. A quiet voice saying: be careful.

Because being drawn to magic is one thing. Believing you might carry something powerful inside you is another.

For a long time, that idea scared me. I feared that if I looked too closely – if I truly discovered my own intuition, sensitivity or power – I would change too much. That I would lose the safety of my ordinary life. That I would no longer recognize myself. So I stayed close to the threshold, curious but hesitant, watching from the edge.

When my father passed away in 2013, that threshold cracked open. Grief pushed me into questions I could no longer ignore: What happens after death? Where does love go? What is the soul?

I began reading – slowly, carefully – about the afterlife, reincarnation, energy, chakras and consciousness. Not as rebellion, but as searching. As mourning. As love that refused to disappear.

Years later, crystals entered my life. Tarot followed. I took online courses in Reiki, Tarot and radiesthesia – not to predict the future or control forces, but to understand symbols, intention and attention. I created small, personal rituals. Quiet moments. Candles. Incense. Silence. Reflection.

And still, I was afraid.

Because I am Orthodox.

Within Orthodox teaching, practices such as divination, Tarot or the use of spiritual tools are traditionally forbidden and considered incompatible with the faith. This perspective exists to protect believers from deception, pride and the misuse of spiritual curiosity – concerns I understand and respect deeply.

I carried this tension inside me for a long time.

I was afraid of what people would think.
Afraid of being misunderstood.
Afraid of judgment.
Afraid of being seen as doing something forbidden or wrong.

So I stayed quiet. Selective. Careful about who I shared these parts of myself with.

Yet, in my heart, I never felt I was stepping away from God.

What I felt instead was reverence.

I came to understand these tools not as powers in themselves, but as symbols – much like icons, candles, incense or psalms. Ways of focusing the mind. Of opening the heart. Of listening more deeply. I never stopped praying. I never stopped believing. I simply learned to sit with mystery without fear.

This understanding didn’t come all at once.
It came slowly. Gently. With humility.

And one day, I realized something had changed.

I was no longer afraid.

Not of magic.
Not of faith.
Not of myself.

The Scared Witch name suits me – not because I am still frightened, but because I remember who I was. A girl standing between wonder and fear, longing and restraint, belief and curiosity.

This website is the space where all of that is allowed to exist together.

It is not a place of instruction or doctrine.
It is not a rejection of faith.
It is a place of stories, symbols, reflection and becoming.

Here, magic is quiet.
Faith is personal.
And the unseen is met with trust, not haste.

If you, too, have ever felt drawn to something you were taught to fear, know that gentleness is a path.
And listening is a form of devotion. 🌙